On Robert Pants II

I needed Katara’s number.

Wait! Let me Finish!

I did not reach out he sent me a stupid Christmas message in a bottle and my dumbass opened it. It was only his number in red and green. Of course.

You know who he is.

Anyway, I needed some help from Katara. I wanted to talk to her but he knows I don’t have her number.

Last time I saw him, that yellow bastard physically took my cell phone (and my contacts)… so I took it and slammed it against the wall. I’m not proud, it was not great. That last time He was trying to get me started in a bad way and I just left.

I don’t want to talk about it.

Which is funny, because that’s exactly what happened.

I called his ass (international from a Land Line like a cave-person) and he answered the phone.

I waited on him to speak. He waited on me to speak.

And it went on for 49 minutes.

I lost patience and hung up…he won. He knows I don’t want to speak to him…I needed information.

He always does this near around my anniversary. (Which is ridiculous because he never remembered ours.)

Gods only know what he did to Squidward before he started with me.

He doesn’t even want my attention anymore, just wants to remind me he’s still on T.V….



You’re going to give Katara my new number, Bobby.

Before the 1st.

Thank you.

Please don’t make me come down there.

Send the message, then loose my number, and don’t ever tell me how you knew exactly where and when I was.


Published by Chanzy

He's a mess. What else?

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